"In transition"

My catch phrase lately.or mantra as they say.Its been my state of mind for a while now.my current state of being.self-induced.partly circumstantial.

And I'm allowing it to rule me. Its affecting my relationships.my associations.my attitudes.I put too many things on hold. Trips to visit outstation friends. Commitment to work. Heck! even buying a new phone! On one hand, its convenient. I am a procrastinator.(wavering in my pride of late!) On the other hand, I think, mentally, I need my next milestone to come through soon. I've set my heart on it for a while now. And have assumed that everything needs to (and will) revolve around it. The flip-side of that of course is that if it doesn't come through, i will be quite lost for a while to come.

one is taught not to put all ones eggs into one basket. pin all one's hopes on (to?) something. all of us have traces of superstition creeping into our minds, the first chance it gets.

Pessimism assumes the perfect defence mechanism. preparing oneself for the worst. stamping out all signs of desperate hope that things will come through.

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In transition. Yet I seem to be the only one left behind. While everyone has desperately, ambitiously, doggedly moved on..hoping to figure out what exactly they set out to do in the first place. Metaphorically. and literally.

In transition. Goodbyes and hellos. watching the hourglass. waiting. the shrinking world greedily swallowing my security blanket away.

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In transition. Too much to do. Too little time. the perennial cliche.

Afterthought:
I use too many full-stops! reflection of finality or even decisiveness? I wish.